I often speak very fondly of Persia, making sure any listeners understand that these people are not, under any circumstances, to be mistaken for Arabs. Usually there is someone that will start asking questions about whether Iran was dangerous, did I fear for my life etc and I play a fairly straight bat and tell them the truth - that I was so scared I wrote my first Will before entering the country. I was 26 and found the whole ordeal rather sobering. Although I can honestly say we had an incredible time visiting the country, with hospitable and welcoming people, it wasn't so much my life that I should have been scared of.

We were in Shiraz, a poetic, romantic city, steeped in heat and history. A short drive away is the infamous Persepolis, the exulted palace Darius and Xerxes, but our interests for the day lay far closer to the city of grape-fame. With our vehicle once again causing havoc in our journey, an excited Western-dressed gentleman with short dark hair approached and the conversation went something like this (dispensing with some of the other pleasantries like names etc.) with my thoughts added in brackets:

IRANIAN MAN: Where you from?
RICHARD: (Here we go again, you’re not from the UK remember as they hate those dudes) Ireland, Irlanda, Dublin.
IRANIAN MAN: Ing-land?
RICHARD: No, Ireland, Irrlanda, Irr-landa.
IRANIAN MAN: Oh okay.
RICHARD: Do you live in Shiraz? It is a lovely …
IRANIAN MAN: Irrlanda.
RICHARD: We are going to Yazd but we are having trouble with our vehicle.
IRANIAN MAN: I not understand.
RICHARD: We go Yazd, but battery is kaput. Can you help?
IRANIAN MAN: I not understand.
RICHARD: Battery not work. Do you have a car?
IRANIAN MAN: Ah yes, battery … car?
RICHARD: Car, machine, vehicle, machine.
IRANIAN MAN: Ah my car, yes I have car.
RICHARD: Brilliant. Is your car near here?
IRANIAN MAN: Yes, yes, car is near … how old you?
RICHARD: (Hang on …) You have car near here?
IRANIAN MAN: Yes, yes. How old you?
RICHARD: (Sigh) I am twenty-six years old.
IRANIAN MAN: Oh right. I am twenty-six … no wait, twenty-four years old.
RICHARD: (You’re bloody not) Oh good. Well I have to find someone to help with the bat--
IRANIAN MAN: What is deek?
RICHARD: What?
IRANIAN MAN: What is deek?
RICHARD: (Does he mean dick?) Deek?
IRANIAN MAN: Yes, deek. Man and boy have, woman and girl not. What is deek?
RICHARD: (Right okay … he means dick) You mean dick?
IRANIAN MAN: Yes dick? What is dick?
RICHARD: (He does mean dick. Let’s be mature about this) Dick means penis.
IRANIAN MAN: What is penis?
RICHARD: (Oh for God’s sake!) Penis. It is the thing you pee out of.
IRANIAN MAN: Ah yes. You have dick? You have good dick?
RICHARD: <SILENCE> What?
IRANIAN MAN: You have good dick, yes?
RICHARD: (You dirty …) I’m going to find someone to help with battery. Goodbye.
IRANIAN MAN: Nice to meet you …

I think he said something else afterwards but by that time I was headed for the nearest driver who didn’t look like he wanted to shag me. Quite a search as you can imagine. So that's Persia...not what you were expecting, right?

As I embark on my first trip to Central and South America (Costa Rica, Panama and Ecuador, here I come!) I’m packing my bag with 4 weeks to go already. This might seem slightly mental, and admittedly it is, but packing is something that is an absolute art. Take too much and you’re effectively a tiny pack-horse carting around things you’ll never need but will be brilliant in the “what-if” scenario. Pack too little and...well, this has never happened, I don’t know what this is like.

For my last trip to ‘The Stans’ I’d purchased an incredible versatile and lightweight 44 litre back-pack. It’s got everything I need – tonnes of space, flexible, lightweight, it’s just brilliant! As I pack for this trip, and I start decreasing and decreasing my initial loads, I’m realising its way too big and I may well be re-using my 25 litre day pack again. 25 litres for 4 weeks travel....blimey. So here are some of my packing tips I’ve picked up across my travels, hope they’re useful. Some, admittedly, are bleeding obvious, but some have proved extremely useful:

• Everything I read says that I probably need half the amount of clothes I usually take. I struggle with this personally and this trip will be the ultimate test of that. In Uzbekistan I met a lovely older German couple in their 60’s that had long retired and we got to talk about packing, as you do. He believed that after the first day your t-shirt is a little unclean, and the second day it’s dirty. So by the third day...it’s still dirty, and the fourth? Well, then it needs a wash! But he got 3 to 4 days out of every t-shirt. Now...without sounding like an absolute filth-monger, I’m going to aim for 3 days.  I have to say I feel like I’m luxuriating myself with 3 whole t-shirts.
• Packing Cells are apparently brilliant, save space and enable you to squeeze your clothes into tight spots. Sounds great, right? What I find works for me is the cheap large zip-lock bags from your supermarket which will cost you about $5 for 15. I have one currently that has in it a 3 rolled t-shirts, 2 rolled boxer shorts, 2 pairs of socks., and costs barely anything. You’re average packing cell? $10.
• Roll instead of folding – this may seem like an obvious one, but when you roll clothes into a bundle and then put them into the zip-lock bags as a packing cell, you’re streets ahead. What I tend to do is roll them in and close the zip-lock’s hall way, then kneel on them to get the air out. Admittedly where I go, I don’t iron a great deal...
• Wear all the heavy big stuff on the airplane. It’s important to be comfortable, but instead of packing the walking boots, jacket and thick socks, wear them on the flight. Take a plastic bag with you to take your heavy walking boots off if you want to get comfortable, or buy lightweight waterproof ones. I’m expect some torrential downpours in since it’ll be the rain season in Central America, so we’ll see how we go with my new boots.
• Needless to say that with airplane travel being super cautious, you need to pack all your toiletries in one clear bag, but why not pack all toiletries in small clear bottles? I prefer to take liquid washing liquid but others prefer powder (powder doesn’t do well when hand-washing, at least when I do it!), but most things can be down-sized tremendously. If you plan on staying in hotels they will have soap and shampoo anyway so save space and use theirs. If you’re staying in hostels, take only small portions of the things you need in 100ml seal-able bottles. Old Listerine travel size bottles are great as they lock tight (some with child locks), are clear and can hold a good few days worth of shampoo or shower gel.
  
• Re-use small travel toothpastes by getting a larger one and re-filling. I saw a tip for this on another site and thought it was a genius of an idea. Undo both caps of the small and large toothpaste, fit them together and then just squeeze from one to the other...slowly! I love this trick, and will certainly be using again in the future.
• Once you’ve identified the stuff you want to take with you, lay it all out on your bed. Do you really need everything you’ve identified? And by need, I mean excluding the “what if” scenarios. Delve into every pocket and drag those items out from your last trips, even your passport holder. I just rifled through mine and, lucky me, found a good few thousand Uzbeki som...about one dollar! Am I going to need this in Costa Rica? Probably not.
• Don’t take books. I know they’re lovely to thumb through and tactile, but your iPhone, tablet or kindle will do perfectly fine. Save space and weight, this is a modern-day no brainer. When I went to Rome for a week I remember taking about 4 or 5 heavy books thinking that I would have all this down-time and I would need to fill it with reading...turns out there were things to do and people to meet, so why spend your time reading when you’ve travelled half way around the world to be in the place you’re at! Look up and experience where you are
• Medication – get yourself a small but standard first aid kit with plasters, tape etc I always include nurofen and some cold & flu stuff too since I always seem to get colds wherever I travel. Inevitable really when you’re with 200 people on a plane. For the first time I’m taking anti-bacterial throat lozenges too to keep the nasties at bay
  
• Small notepad and pen in case you’re having to leave a note for someone or draw some directions.  I always carry a sharpie as it can write on almost everything. To make notes when travelling I generally use Evernote for pretty much everything as it’s fantastically simple, and when do you not have your phone on you?
• Guilty pleasures – these can be your favourite book (thin one), fancy earphones etc but my guilty pleasure is my camera. I’ve downgraded from my Canon 7d to a smaller micro 4/3ds Olympus. The pictures are great yet it’s far less cumbersome. I’ve also grabbed a different shoulder strap rather than the usual break-your-neck strap, and I also carry with me a mini gorillapod to get those night shots I love so much. It does have extra weight, but it’s offset from the pleasure I get in taking photos as well as capturing those golden few images on holiday that you look at time and again

So far in my 25 litre I’ve packed:

• 3 t-shirts
• 3 pairs of socks
• 1 waterproof jacket
• A pair of loafers or smart shoes
• 2 pairs of underwear
• Baseball cap
• My tablet (mini iPad), USB cables, portable charger, travel adapter, phone, earphones
• Camera, batteries, charger, spare SD card, spare lens
• I’ll be wearing jeans, 1 warm jacket, thick socks, probably some underwear (ha!), light jacket
• Foldable bag and day-pack (not sure I’ll need that last one, as I’m taking a bloody day pack!)
• Passport, money, passport copies, small padlocks, earplugs
• Camelbak 3L water reservoir
• Nurofen, cold and flu tablets, lemsip and strepsils (told you always get colds), sleeping tablets
  
• Detol handwash and my toiletaries, all put into small tubs and packs
  

 
Will keep you posted on how I travel!