Well, that was weird. Since when did ‘so how are you doing?’ turn into a bit of a cry and a hug? I hope that doesn’t happen all the time, as everyone in Australia is exceptionally friendly and will ask how are ya! as soon as look at you. Although perhaps I could use it to my advantage – turns on the waterworks, lean in for a hug, steal their wallet.
The thing was, I was as surprised as the huggee. You see, nothing untoward actually happened. We were talking about work and I had my doubts about a task that had been set for me – my emotions ran at about one hundred miles an hour but eventually they settled, I understood the basics and then got down to it. I then had a chat about the approach with my manager and friend. In relaying that I needed to watch just how much work I became engrossed in and prefacing the importance of my mental health, the bastard then asked me if I was all right. I mean, who does that?! Asking about my welfare like that!
As ever, it’s all about the positives. I realised that whilst making great progress in self-belief, making time for myself and reading more than I had in years in the last few months, I hadn’t tested myself yet for fear of breaking – well, at least work wise. In my mind, this is the equivalent of giving up alcohol and claiming everything is fine to your friends whilst handcuffing yourself to the radiator so you never leave the house. Whilst the fear of breaking is strong, I have to build on my achievements, embrace a little danger now and then. Risk a little, essentially. Being entirely open with my friend in talking about my fears will help immensely – no one can help you if they don’t know what’s wrong, or at least where you’re coming from. Sometimes, like today, nothing was wrong at all . . . and then someone asks at the wrong time and boom! Waterworks, hugging . . . shopping!
Monopoly Pic from my own set - I don't own the company and am not affiliated with them at all, and they've sent me to jail a few times it has to be said.
Writing and writing...